To get what you want, you have to want what you get.
-Paraphrased from an unknown author
There is so much truth and wisdom in this short yet powerful sentence. It is, in a nutshell, the best advice I can give regarding acquiring new skills, building your goal body, becoming healthier, attracting great relationships, progressing in your career, making more money, or just in general creating the life of your dreams!
Appreciating what we already have opens our eyes to notice opportunities that are already available to us... opportunities which are impossible to detect when we are spending our time focused on what we don't have. That attitude of gratitude then goes on to attract more new outcomes that bring us the same feeling, resulting in a beautiful cycle of awesomeness.
As it relates specifically to raqs sharqi (belly dance), this means that if you want to become a better dancer or achieve specific dance goals, the best way to go about it is to not be frustrated by the level you currently find yourself at, not to look at other dancers who are "better" than you and compare yourself to them in a way that puts you down, but instead to fully appreciate where you are at right now, all while keeping your goals in the back of your mind as you enjoy every moment of your journey towards achieving them.
Look at me, your dear author, fully appreciating the fact that I am dancing to this incredible live band on a stage in LA ;)
Does this seem vague, abstract, or too "woo woo" for you?
Then let me put it a bit differently... I'll give you two scenarios, and you tell me which one will lead to more progress for the dancer in question.
Dancer A took up belly dancing classes because she was enchanted by the gracefulness, elegance and femininity of raqs sharqi. But every time she comes to class, she can't help but look around the room and feel horrible about herself. She hates the way her body looks, and she struggles with new steps and movements. When she looks around, she sees that other students are "getting it," which only adds to her frustration. When she sees a professional dancer, there is a nagging voice inside her head that says things like "You'll never be able to dance like that," "you started way too late to ever be any good," or "you're too ugly to perform in public."
Dancer B also took up belly dance because of its feminine elegance and gracefulness. But when she comes to class, she does not focus on what anyone else is doing; she only focuses on herself and her own learning. She appreciates her body and the fact that it is healthy and functional and able to learn this amazing art form. If she does look around the room, it's to appreciate how wonderful it is that all these people are gathered together to learn new ways to move their body and express themselves to complex, poetic music. When she sees a professional dancer, she thinks "I'm so lucky that I get to see this performance" "that'll be me some day," or "I'm so inspired by this dancer!"
If both these dancers take the same exact class, practice the same amount of time, and take the same actions to improve, which one do you think will see more visible progress? Which one will be happier in their journey? Which one is most likely to stick with it longer? I think the answer is so obvious I don't even need to say it!
Still skeptical? Then I'll leave you with this: why not give this whole attitude of gratitude thing a try, starting now? It is Thanksgiving week, after all! Jot down a couple of positive things belly dance has brought into your life. Note a couple of positive things about your own dancing, as it is right now. Lastly, write about the dancers you love the most, and then visualize yourself embodying all those characteristics you just wrote about.
Feel like sharing what you wrote? Post it in the comments below!
If you do this regularly and consistently, you will notice a visible difference in both your attitude and your dancing, and you won't want to stop that beautiful cycle of awesomeness. Bring that gratitude attitude into every aspect of your life, and you will reap the rewards as you see yourself flourishing in every possible way.
I hope you have an amazing Thanksgiving this week.
Has the idea of joining a belly dance class been nagging you for some time, but every time you get the chance, you back out at the last minute because you are afraid of the unknown?
If so, it sounds like you are suffering from a case of "cold belly!" Like cold feet, cold belly is a doubt strong enough to prevent you from doing something you were planning on doing, in this case, going to that belly dance class you've been wanting to try! And believe it or not, this "cold belly" phenomenon is is more common than you think!
Maybe you're afraid of having to bare your belly, or you think the class will be packed with young, mean women who will make you feel bad about yourself. Or maybe you're insecure about your lack of dance experience and you picture a class full of experienced dancers, making you think you won't be able to keep up with everyone else. Maybe you think you're not fit enough to try out this dance, or maybe you just don't feel like getting up and going out after you've already settled in at home for the night...
Regardless of the reasons behind your apprehension and inaction, the fact of the matter is that you are not alone in feeling this way! In fact, the majority of women who show interest in belly dance classes never actually end up showing up for one!
But isn't that a shame? Because the reality of most belly dance classes in the US (and certainly the reality for our belly dance classes at SharqiDance in New Jersey) is that they are a gentle, friendly and fun environment for women (and sometimes men and non-gender binary folks) of all ages, levels, shapes, and sizes to learn how to move their bodies in incredible ways and how to express themselves artistically through dance all while falling in love with Middle Eastern music and culture!
Most people start belly dancing because they think it will be a fun way to exercise. But most people stick with belly dancing because of the amazing connections they make with the incredible people they meet in class and in their local community, all while challenging themselves--inside a supportive environment--to keep getting better and better at this rich and evolving art form!
There is nothing to fear. You don't even need to show your belly to belly dance! In fact, most people in class actually don't.
You also don't need prior dance experience to start belly dancing, and there is no age too young or too old to start. And guess what, you can become quite good even if you start late in life without any prior dance experience, because belly dance is low-impact and easy on your body!
This also means you do not need to be fit to start belly dance, and you might be glad to learn that the belly dance community embraces a much wider range of looks, body types and sizes than society at large!
That doesn't mean the dance is easy, it just means that with guidance from a good teacher and practice, consistency, and time, it can be done well no matter who you are or what you look like!
Does that sound like something you should be scared of? We think not!
It's time to stop letting the weeks, months and years go by, and just give belly dance a shot already! Just imagine where you could be in one, five, or ten years if you just take that chance and get started today! You might discover a fun new thing to do every week, or you might uncover a lifelong passion. Or maybe you'll find that belly dance is not for you, but you won't know until you've tried!
So, are you ready to try out a class?
Belly dance is a long-enduring art form that embodies the rich and diverse cultures and traditions of its native regions. It is mainly characterized by controlled, smooth and fluid isolations of the hips, as well as sharp hip accents and vibration movements that give visual representation to complex Mideastern rhythms and melodies.
Famous for its sensual elegance, belly dance brings out our most feminine qualities in ways that are tactful and classy, while connecting us to music and cultural traditions from the Middle East. Belly dance truly is poetry in motion...
Over recent decades, this dance has taken the world by storm and become somewhat of an underground global dance phenomenon. These days, one can find world-renowned dancers in places ranging from North & Latin America, to Europe's East & West as well as Asia-Pacific in addition to its places of origin and constant innovation in the Middle East and North Africa!
Belly dance appeals to so many people--particularly women--around the world for countless reasons. At SharqiDance, some of our favorite reasons are:
If you are local to the New Jersey Shore's Ocean County or Monmouth County areas, come join our belly dance classes to find out why this dance is becoming all the rage throughout the world!
We all have different backgrounds. Most of us came to belly dance at different stages of our lives, for different reasons and with different goals, and we all started with differing amounts of natural skill. We also have different learning styles and prioritize the dance differently in our lives.
Belly dance can mean different things to different people. Some do it for fun and socialization, or as way to get to know more about a foreign culture and its enchanting music and dances. Others do it as an outlet for artistic expression, or as a form of exercise to get in touch with their bodies at a deeper level. Some just belly dance to feel more sexy and beautiful, while others want to reach the highest levels, dancing at professional venues or competitive stages.
No matter your reasons for being drawn to belly dance, always remember that your journey through this dance is unique to you, and honor that unique journey by looking within yourself for the reasons why you do this dance, so that every time you do it, you can seek to get out of it the feelings, experiences, and results that you need.
There is no reason to look at other dancers with judgment if you think they are worse than you and therefore not "worthy." There is also no reason to look at other dancers with envy if you think they are "better" than you or that they have some unfair advantage. Those dancers are walking their own paths that are different from yours, for their own reasons that are different from yours, encountering their own roadblocks that are different from yours, towards destinations that are also different from yours.
If you spend time comparing yourself to others, you lose sight of your own journey and give up control of your destiny! You miss out on lessons you can learn from your individual struggles and on the unique insights you can offer, because no one else has walked the same path as you. You miss the opportunity to learn more about yourself and carve a path that truly fits your own needs, hopes and dreams!
Respect your unique journey through belly dance, honor and own all the reasons why you dance, and don't worry about what others are doing. This way you will feel happier throughout your journey, and it will take you to the most incredible destinations!
Ten years from now… you’ll be wishing you had started TODAY!
Think of all the hobbies and activities you have always wanted to try, but never made the time or gathered up the courage to take that first step…
Where would you be today, if you had started when the idea had first popped into your head? What’s on your mind right now? Where will you be tomorrow?
If you are looking to start something new for your body or for your mind, then you need to look no further than dance as it blends the best of both worlds. With dance you get fitness (working your body) and art (working your creativity and musical ear) in one shot!
In recent years, we have seen scientific study after study published that confirms what us dancers have always known: dance is not just great exercise for the body, it is also great exercise for the mind!
Dancing has been linked with improvements in memory and creativity, reduced risk of Alzheimer’s, and reduced levels of stress and depression.
Needless to say the benefits of dance on the body include increased cardiovascular capacity and muscular strength and endurance, better flexibility, balance and coordination, more energy, and so much more!
Belly dance in particular has also been linked with increased self-esteem and positive body image in many of its practitioners.
Of course all this will depend on the individual, on the genre, and on the class in particular, but you will certainly enjoy at least some of these benefits by joining a belly dance class today!
What’s great about belly dance is that it provides all these benefits while being gentle on the body. You don’t need to have started as a child to ever become good at it. You don’t need to have a specific body type, as all body types are both welcome in class and even represented in the professional realm. You don’t even need to be at a high fitness level to start, and you certainly don’t need any fancy clothes or equipment!
All you need is to show up and to be open and willing to learn; and learn you will! You will learn movements and steps, you will learn music and culture, you will achieve amazing things all while having fun!
The belly dance community in our area of New Jersey is still small, but it’s growing fast. Don’t miss your chance to become a part of it—right now—because one year from now you will be amazed at what your body can do and how much you’ve learned. Ten years from now, well… we can only imagine! The sky is the limit!
Yamê is a Brazilian-American belly dancer based out of New Jersey, USA.